The Second Affair!

Many couples in Second Life have a spouse or significant other in Real Life. We all have our own version of what makes our ‘RL Marriage’ a happy one and for that matter even our ‘SL Partnerships’. One of the biggest questions since it all began June 23, 2003, is it cheating or not? Our RL husbands & wives would have their own opinion and I am sure the husband & wives of our lovers would not be overly delighted, but, do we feel we are cheating? If not, why? If so, why do we continue?  Do we get upset if our SL lover cheats?  Why be upset? Are we not doing the same thing to our RL spouses via the forum called Second Life? Do we have different sets of SL versus RL morals? Most people eventually log off from an SL bed, then crawl directly into bed with their RL lover. I wonder how many have self conflict with that.

I saw a DJ and his SL girlfriend or SL partner on the dance floor, she was there to support his set. His voice rings out over the mic,”Congratulations, it’s my wonderful RL wife’s birthday. Happy Birthday babe, I could not have got this far without you. I love you!” No doubt she gave him a thank you kiss in RL. Ironically, he then proceeds to play a romantic song, for his SL girlfriend. Now personally, I found that awkward as ‘Fu*k’!  Am I the only one that feels this way, I doubt it. This topic has always been the elephant in the room, right!

Unless they are Polyamorous ( another blog completely )

 Polyamory (from Greek πολύ poly, “many, several”, and Latin amor, “love“) is the practice, desire, or acceptance of intimate relationships that are not exclusive with respect to other sexual or intimate relationships, with knowledge and consent of everyone involved. It has been described as “consensual, ethical, and responsible.

Now, I wonder how happy his RL wife would be {on her birthday} knowing that after his set, he is going to have the best pixel sex, emote sex or skype sex with his SL girlfriend. More pressing, would he deny or admit this is an affair.

Is it still considered promiscuity if we never voice, nor see an RL photo and simply type sexual emotes & promises of love to each other? Or, is it promiscuity if you voice and/or cam. Some say it’s like comparing a convent to a brothel, the comparisons are too vastly different, or are they. The intention is still there , the words whether in type or voice are still the same words, right or wrong?  Are you just as invested? Many people feel more invested in an SL relationship with Skype, the laughter in your ear, the dialect of the conversation. This is known as a ‘crossover’ bridging the two worlds and bringing it to another level completely. Once you ‘crossover’ anything less is mundane and void to most.

Is all the above behavior excused because it’s Second Life? I am sure if I took a poll, the verdict would be  YES. Most people  DON’T condone cheating, those living in glass houses should not throw stones.  Yet, they cover up the mirror so they can’t see their own reflection looking back at them. Is this SL person that you may never meet face to face enough to put your RL marriage & family at risk? Are the rewards worth the consequences? Confessing your SL sins, is that a conversation you want to have at the dinner table? I doubt it. Make sure the kids are out of the house for that tsunami.

Is it the case of, ” What happens in SL stays in SL”. I am calling ” Switzerland “on this topic. I think there are too many, if’s and but’s to claim it’s a clear-cut conversation.

*I could go on and on about meeting in SL and turning it into RL, Polyamorous, RL couples coming in together, etc. That would turn this into a book, those other scenarios also deserve their own podium –  at a later date 😉

~You have to admit, it’s a touchy subject in more ways than one.~

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Body –Maitreya, Head –LOGO, Applier – ItGirls Alessa, Hair –Catwa Aura, Bra – erratic christina turquoise , Jewelry – Lazuri Perles de gloire, Cigarette – Anachron